The Flaw with Higher Education: What I wish I knew going in to college...

It's my sophomore year of college and I find myself looking back and regretting everything I've done while in college. I regret the choice I made, the reasons why I made that choice, and the decisions I've made since I've been in college. I came to terms this year that I chose Baylor because it's a big name school-- and that's all that mattered to me in high school. I've already changed my major and I'm still not sure I'm in a major that I'm 100% interested in. The problem with society is that it paints this unrealistic picture that everyone should graduate high school and go straight into college to get a degree and potentially get a high-paying job. 

Yesterday, I read a post by my friend about why she wished she hadn't gone to college, and I wholeheartedly agreed with it. Life just seems like one big competition where people work their butts off and in 30 years look back and realize they didn't accomplish anything they had planned to. Remember in elementary school when teachers would ask us to draw or write down our goals and aspirations for the future, you write a letter to yourself or make a bucket list and when you look back at it you realize that you can't cross anything off of it. Why is money and wealth and success the main root of our happiness? Shouldn't we be finding happiness in exploring? Going out and traveling--maybe trying something new? 

Okay...so maybe some people have their lives figured out and medical school was always a part of their future, but I'm here in college, wasting time and money still fiddling around not knowing what I want to do with my life. There's still so many places I want to travel to, so many different things I want to experience and try, and I still have to figure out myself and my purpose. 

Personally, I think higher education shouldn't be rushed. My advisor was pressuring me to cram classes into my schedule for next year so that I could still "graduate on time." Why is there always a time limit? Can't I just sit back and enjoy the view? 

This post seems very bleak and down, but I assure you there are still many positives to higher education--just make sure that you're doing it for you and not because society pushes it on you. If I could go back, I would have made a different choice, I would have stayed in state, I would have chosen a less costly school, and I would have taken some more time figuring out what I wanted to pursue as potential majors. 

I have three younger sisters, one of them is a junior looking into colleges for herself. I wish I had an older sibling who could have given me advice about being grown up. It's not all it's cut out to be-- I should have enjoyed high school more, taken advantage of opportunities that were thrown my way and tried new things but instead I was too worried about my GPA and graduation cords. 

We're not defined by the grades we make or the amount of money we have, but we are defined by the kind of people we end up as based on the experiences and stories we created for ourselves. My story may have some bumps and dips, but everyone's does and those bumps and dips and detours lead us to where we are going and define the choices and lessons we learn in life. So honestly, I may regret a lot, but I wouldn't go back and erase any of it because it has given me the knowledge and value that I put on education and success in general. 

Be Okay

Let's talk about the tough stuff...The other day I was scrolling through my facebook and Instagram accounts and taking in everything that everyone else has: Why is it that social media is our biggest competitor? I know I'm talking to everyone when I say that pictures, videos, and status' are the biggest forms of degradation in our lives. We log on, scroll through our newsfeed, scroll past graduation photos, and status' that make us eel worthless and lower than we are.
Today I pulled up my facebook out of pure boredom, I scanned through my newsfeed and within a few posts I found myself sifting through high school graduation photos. Even though I graduated over a year ago, I'm finding myself over a year later, still envying my friends who got another year to make their high school experience the best. And it's not that my high school experience was even awful. I've just found ways for my life to seem not as interesting as others.
This is not to say my life is boring in any way... Instead it's quite the opposite. I am now a sophomore at Baylor University where I am studying psychology in hopes to become a school counselor or family lawyer. But, there's still that envious feeling that I didn't trust my instinct when it mattered. These moments slip in and out when I feel like I've missed a big opportunity because of an impulsive choice. The biggest thing that I constantly remind myself is that God has a plan for me and that plan will work itself out in the end.
I recently saw the movie "God's Not Dead" in theaters. First off: it's incredible! I loved every second of it, I highly recommend it to ANYONE of any religious background. The part that really dug into my brain was a conversation between a man and his mother. His mother was suffering from amnesia and she was slowly deteriorating. Her successful son came to visit her on account of his sister. He sat there in anger watching his lifeless mother as she stared blankly into space and criticized her strong beliefs and faith for God. His life was supposedly perfect: successful career, lots of money, riches, immediate happiness while his mother prayed her whole life, believed and put every effort into being the best person she could be as a servant of God. Yet, here he sat, healthy and rich while his mother was dying before his eyes. While he questioned it, he didn't feel the need to change his behavior towards others, nor did he give his sister's text message a second thought about God.
So what can we take away from this movie? Life is crazy, it has unexpected turns and twists and not every moment can be joyous and happy like this generation seems to think it has to be. But in the end God has a plan for everyone and as faithful stewards of his, we have to trust that his plan will bring us more riches and happiness than we could ever imagine.
Ever notice that social media only showcases the extremes in our life? We are the ones who are in control of what we post and what other's see, so we mask our profiles to make people believe what they want to about us. Crazy enough, friends and followers still feed off the mask of other's lives and compare it to their own... Life can't be comparable. Each person is unique and each person has faults. Everyone messes up, every day can't be a perfect hair day or a day where nothing goes wrong... But everyday can be a day of celebrating God and celebrating how great it is to be alive and on this earth embracing the present and anticipating the bright future ahead.
The song I chose for this post is one of my favorites for this summer season. It's by a new band called Oh Honey. This song is called "Be Okay" and it's so perfect for this topic.

This song hits it spot on! I honestly have nothing to complain about: I have a great life, loving family, amazing friends, world class education, incredible opportunities, and God on my side. And with all of that my life is more than OKAY. 

My challenge is to find the positives in everything. Don't be the one scrolling through facebook envying everyone else: live for you! So what if you can't have the cute dress in the window of your favorite store? Or if you can't have the latest gadget that the media pushes its consumers to get. Life is amazing and God has our plans drawn out on a sketchpad. Trust in him and things will work out in time :)

Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)

Lately I've been hearing a lot about slavery, human trafficking, and abuse victims. At Baylor alone I've heard so many people speak about these topics and the enormously sad number of victims that were and still are involved in all these sorts of forced labor. So I did a little research... Today, many of you have seen people with a red X drawn across their hand, I as well drew one on the back of mine, not because I've been out clubbing or raving or just for the heck of it, but because this is a mission all linked with the End It Movement*. Worldwide, today, February 27th is the "Shine a light on Slavery" day. The red X is to raise awareness of the 27 million people around the world still enslaved. Unfortunately, slavery is still a big problem in the world, and we can no longer ignore it...

Slavery is defined when one person has complete control over another person, may be using physical force, and the person being enslaved is neither being paid nor able to leave. From there, slavery can be defined under numerous subdivisions. A big awareness going around my school is human and sex trafficking. Trafficking is when a human being (usually young pre-teen, teen girls) is taken by force from their community and forced to work against their will with the use of deception, violence, and/or coercion. 

Today is the day to raise awareness about this, so I'm spreading the word! I hope you all have time to check out the End the Movement website here. I'm already signed on to get more involved, but this is a never ending process. Today is an awareness day, but after today this movement still needs people to fight against slavery. 

One of my most favorite songs is Oceans by Hillsong United. Their song is posted below. This song is so beautiful and I think it ties directly to this situation of slavery. God calls us all out to do something that we are unsure of and uncomfortable with at first. But as stewards of God's creation, it is out duty to listen to him call us each by name and listen wholeheartedly to what he wants each of us to achieve. Me? I'm not exactly sure my definite path, but I know that I'm one step closer by attending Baylor, and another step closer to getting my Psychology degree and from there, I will just see what God has for me. 

If you got a chance to listen to the song and loved it as much as I do, I wanted to comment a little on the meaning. I've been so filled up with God's spirit and love. And I feel like part of my calling is to draw more people to the attraction that God creates. He says in Matthew 18:20 'Where two or three of you are gathered, I am there also" and again in Hebrews 11, the topic of faith in Jesus is explored. In order to stand up against slavery, we must allow God to work within us in ways that may take away our comfort zones in order to deepen our faith. I believe that God has worked wonders on many people who have gone out and done something about slavery. One woman who comes to mind is Nicole Bromley. She visited Baylor and told everyone her incredible story of growing deeper within God's will and helping so many families in third world countries to become educated on the dangers of human traffickers. She is one of my idols, her story and mission spoke volumes to me and I hope to achieve the work that she has been able to accomplish. One person can make a difference, think what ONE MILLION people could do! 

CHALLENGE: Get involved, dive deeper into God's faith and trust him with something, whether it be opening the Bible and reading through Hebrews 11 or going online to one of the links about slavery and trafficking (I've placed a few in this post) or getting more involved and reading more about slavery, helping the movement to end. This is something bigger than us, and it cannot afford to be ignored anymore. 

*Click here to learn more about the end it movement and get involved!

#enditmovement #shinealightonslavery #onevoice